No Fire Escape

[Rockey's Milk Punch, Rum, Lime]
AKA how to jump from a building into a dumpster. Look, when you gotta go, you gotta go. One note; from personal experience, the recycling bin is not a great choice.

9.5

[Plantation Barbados, Cold Brew, Horchata, Tiki Bitters]
AKA how to disguise a missing digit. On this subject we usually consult our resident expert, Cris G. It’s also a neat magic trick if you’re doing that kind of drinking.

Pass on Dessert

[Michter's Rye, Midori, Cranberry, Lemon]
AKA what to do when your date won’t stop talking about their ex. Sometimes, the past still has its hooks in a person, so we suggest you skip the night cap, exit quietly (remember a nice person pays their share,) and slip into Holiday where a little booze will put it all behind you.

You Can Make It

[Novo Fogo, Lime, Strawberry, Cucumber]
AKA how to deliver a baby in the back of a cab. Ok, so you messed up. You thought you had just a bit more time. Turns out you were very much mistaken, and now it’s time to face the music and dance. Our advice is to be sure you have plenty of cash on hand for what is bound to be a messy ride and a pissed off driver, but then again we are only bartenders, we just help you to the cab.

3am on Saint Mark's Place

[Don Q Anejo, Ilegal Mezcal, Maple Syrup, Mole Bitters]
AKA what to do when the animals escape the zoo. You have to get them back in the cage, it was your fault, and you left the damn thing open. Realistically, you have 2 options: chase them all, or entice with treats. As a helpful hint, we always prefer treats!

You're the Guest of Honor, Surprise!

[Tanqueray 10, Apricot, Lemon, Earl Grey, Bubbles]
AKA how to make an impromptu toast. Take it from us, skip the story about spring break, skip the anecdote about your experiences with questionable substances; just stick to health and happiness for all. Don’t forget to, “Raise your glasses!”

Pen in the Company Ink

[Krogstadt Aquavit, Apple Shrub, Lemon, Bubbles]
AKA dealing with a workplace romance. First of all, we sympathize with your particular brand of incompetence. Secondly, one of you should quit. Well no, it’s you. You should quit.

Bernie Mad(e)o with Your Money

[Illegal Mezcal, Chareau, Pineapple, Lime, Hibiscus]
AKA how to avoid a scam. Yep, you thought you made it! This is your shot! Wrong. Now have a cocktail while life-lock finishes assessing the damage you’ve done to your financial future.

Locked in the Trunk

[Redemption Rye, Aperol, Lemon, Bubbles]
AKA how to escape if you’re locked in the trunk. You may ask yourself, how did I get here? This is not my life, this is not my trunk. Our advice, try not to let days go by.

Panda Porn

[Plantation 3 Star, Lime, Blackberry]
AKA what to do when the pandas won’t mate. This is straight from the guide, no joke. The guide suggests that you separate the pandas and recommends showing the male panda videos of other pandas mating. We really couldn’t do much more with this.

Holiday #2

Green Tea-Infused Ketel One, Apricot, Lemon, Bubbles

But So Is Arsenic

Tanqueray 10, Midori, Nigori Sake, Honey, Lime

Tecate

Mexico, 4.4%

$6

House Beef

Venice, CA 4.8%

$6

Sea Quench Sour Ale

Milton, DE 4.9%

$7

Rob: Hurricane

Plantation 3 Star Rum

Joe: Monte Carlo

Redemption Rye

Jess: Corpse Reviver #2

Brooklyn Gin

Talia: “Espresso Martini”

Absolut Espresso Vodka

Cristian: Modern Cocktail

Auchentoshan Scotch

Mateo: Paloma

Tromba Tequila/Ancho Reyes

Strange: Gold Rush

Maker’s Mark Bourbon

Ru: Bee’s Knees

Ford’s Navy Strength Gin

Boosh: Surfer on Acid

Plantation 3 Star Rum

Casamiro: Stinger

Fernet Branca Amaro

Wesley: Aperitif Spritz

Lillet Rosé

Patrick: Singapore Sling

Citadelle Gin

Kaye: De La Louisiane

WhistlePig Rye

Barbara: Brazilian Manhattan

Avuá Amburana Cachaça

Novo Fogo Sparkling Caipirinhas Bucket of 4

$44

Bacana Rosé Sparkling Sangrias Bucket of 4

$44

Shot and a Beer Bucket of 4 House Beers & 200ml of Maker’s Mark

$50

Elyx Punch Absolut Elyx, Pineapple Shrub, Guava, Rose Hip

$50

Piña Colada Plantation 3 Star & Plantation O.F.T.D.

$30

Brooklyn Lager

Brooklyn, NY 5.2%

$7

Empire Black Stout

Cazenovia, NY 4.8%

$7

Empire White Aphro

Cazenovia, NY 6%

$7

Old Speckled Hen

Morley, UK 5.2%

$7

Five Boroughs Pilsner

Brooklyn, NY 5%

$7

Brooklyn Brown Ale

Brooklyn, NY 5.6%

$7

Narragansett Lager

Providence, RI 5%

Cigar City Jai Alai IPA

Tampa, FL 7.5%

$7

Austin East Cider

Austin, TX 5%

$7